Don't Sweat the Small Stuff--and it's all small stuff (Don't Sweat the Small Stuff Series)

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ABC Amber LIT Converter http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html Don't Sweat the Small Stuff ... and it's all small stuff [035 5.0] by Richard Carlson, PhD. Synopsis: Simple ways to keep little things from taking over your life Hyperion Books Copyright 1997 ISBN 0-7868-8185-2 I dedicate this book to my daughters, Jazzy and Kenna, who remind me every day how important it is to remember not to "sweat the small stuff." I love you both so much. Thank you for being just the way you are. Acknowledgments I would like to acknowledge the following people for assisting me in the creation of this book: Patti Breitman for her enthusiasm and encouragement surrounding this book and for her dedication and wisdom in not sweating the small stuff. And Leslie Wells for her vision and for her insightful editorial skill. Thank you both very much. Contents Introduction 1. Don't Sweat the Small Stuff 2. Make Peace with Imperfection 3. Let Go of the Idea that Gentle, Relaxed People Can't be Superachievers 4. Be Aware of the Snowball Effect of Your Thinking 5. Develop Your Compassion 6. Remind Yourself that When You Die, Your "In Basket" Won't Be Empty 7. Don't Interrupt Others or Finish Their Sentences

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ABC Amber LIT Converter http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html 8. Do Something Nice for Someone Else - and Don't Tell Anyone About It 9. Let Others Have the Glory 10. Learn to Live in the Present Moment 11. Imagine that Everyone Is Enlightened Except You 12. Let Others Be "Right" Most of the Time 13. Become More Patient 14. Create "Patience Practice Periods" 15. Be the First One to Act Loving or Reach Out 16. Ask Yourself the Question, "Will This Matter a Year from Now?" 17. Surrender to the Fact that Life Isn't Fair 18. Allow Yourself to Be Bored 19. Lower Your Tolerance to Stress 20. Once a Week, Write a Heartfelt Letter 21. Imagine Yourself at Your Own Funeral 22. Repeat to Yourself, "Life Isn't an Emergency" 23. Experiment with Your Back Burner 24. Spend a Moment Every Day Thinking of Someone to Thank 25. Smile at Strangers, Look into Their Eyes, and Say Hello 26. Set Aside Quiet Time, Every Day 27. Imagine the People in Your Life as Tiny Infants and One-Hundred-Year-Old Adults 28. Seek First to Understand 29. Become a Better Listener 30. Choose Your Battles Wisely

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ABC Amber LIT Converter http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html 31. Become Aware of Your Moods and Don't Allow Yourself to Be Fooled by the Low Ones 32. Life Is a Test. It Is Only a Test 33. Praise and Blame Are All the Same 34. Practice Random Acts of Kindness 35. Look Beyond Behavior 36. See the Innocence 37. Choose Being Kind over Being Right 38. Tell Three People (Today) How Much You Love Them 39. Practice Humility 40. When in Doubt about Whose Turn It Is to Take Out Trash, Go Ahead and Take It Out 41. Avoid Weatherproofing 42. Spend a Moment, Every Day, Thinking of Someone to Love 43. Become an Anthropologist 44. Understand Separate Realities 45. Develop Your Own Helping Rituals 46. Every Day, Tell at Least One Person Something You Li Admire, or Appreciate about Them 47. Argue for Your Limitations, and They're Yours 48. Remember that Everything Has God's Fingerprints on it 49. Resist the Urge to Criticize 50. Write Down Your Five Most Stubborn Positions and See if You Can Soften Them 51. Just for Fun, Agree with Criticism Directed Toward (Then Watch It Go Away)

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ABC Amber LIT Converter http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html 52. Search for the Grain of Truth in Other Opinions 53. See the Glass as Already Broken (and Everything Else Too) 54. Understand the Statement, "Wherever You Go, There you Are" 55. Breathe Before You Speak 56. Be Grateful when You're Feeling Good and Graceful when You're Feeling Bad 57. Become A Less Aggressive Driver 58. Relax 59. Adopt a Child Through the Mail 60. Turn Your Melodrama into a Mellow-Drama 61. Read Articles and Books with Entirely Different Points of View from Your Own and Try to Learn Something 62. Do One Thing at a Time 63. Count to Ten 64. Practice Being in the "Eye of the Storm" 65. Be Flexible with Changes in Your Plans 66. Think of What You Have Instead of What You Want 67. Practice Ignoring Your Negative Thoughts 68. Be Willing to Learn from Friends and Family 69. Be Happy Where You Are 70. Remember that You Become What You Practice Most 71. Quiet the Mind 72. Take Up Yoga 73. Make Service an Integral Part of Your Life 74. Do a Favor and Don't Ask For, or Expect, One in Return ABC Amber LIT Converter http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html

ABC Amber LIT Converter http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html 75. Think of Your Problems as Potential Teachers 76. Get Comfortable Not Knowing 77. Acknowledge the Totality of Your Being 78. Cut Yourself Some Slack 79. Stop Blaming Others 80. Become an Early Riser 81. When Trying to Be Helpful, Focus on Little Things 82. Remember, One Hundred Years from Now, All New People 83. Lighten Up 84. Nurture a Plant 85. Transform Your Relationship to Your Problems 86. The Next Time You Find Yourself in an Argument, Rather than Defend Your Position, See if You Can See the Other Point of View First 87. Redefine a "Meaningful Accomplishment" 88. Listen to Your Feelings (They Are Trying to Tell you Something) 89. If Someone Throws You the Ball, You Don't Have to Catch It 90. One More Passing Show 91. Fill Your Life with Love 92. Realize the Power of Your Own Thoughts 93. Give Up on the Idea that "More Is Better" 94. Keep Asking Yourself, "What's Really Important?" 95. Trust Your Intuitive Heart 96. Be Open to "What Is" 97. Mind Your Own Business ABC Amber LIT Converter http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html

ABC Amber LIT Converter http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html 98. Look for the Extraordinary in the Ordinary 99. Schedule Time for Your Inner Work 100. Live This Day as if It Were Your Last. It Might Suggested Reading Introduction The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitude. -WILLIAM JAMES Whenever we're dealing with bad news, a difficult person, or a disappointment of some kind, most of us get into certain habits, ways of reacting to life - particularly adversity - that don't serve us very well. We overreact, blow things out of proportion, hold on too tightly, and focus on the negative aspects of life. When we are immobilized by little things - when we are irritated, annoyed, and easily bothered our (over-) reactions not only make us frustrated but actually get in the way of getting what we want. We lose sight of the bigger picture, focus on the negative, and annoy other people who might otherwise help us. In short, we live our lives as if they were one great big emergency! We often rush around looking busy, trying to solve problems, but in reality, we are often compounding them. Because everything seems like such a big deal, we end up spending our lives dealing with one drama after another. After a while, we begin to believe that everything really is a big deal. We fail to recognize that the way we relate to our problems has a lot to do with how quickly and efficiently we solve them. As I hope you will soon discover, when you learn the habit of responding to life with more ease, problems that seemed "insurmountable" will begin to seem more manageable. And even the "biggies," things that are truly stressful, won't throw you off track as much as they once did. Happily, there is another way to relate to life - a softer, more graceful path that makes life seem easier and the people in it more compatible. This "other way" of living involves replacing old habits of "reaction" with new habits of perspective. These new habits enable us to have richer, more satisfying lives. I'd like to share a personal story that touched my heart and reinforced an important lesson - a story that demonstrates the essential message of this book. As you will see, the events of this story planted the seed for the title of the book you are about to read. ABC Amber LIT Converter http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html

ABC Amber LIT Converter http://www.processtext.com/abclit.html About a year ago a foreign publisher contacted me and requested that I attempt to get an endorsement from best-selling author Dr. Wayne Dyer for a foreign edition of my book You Can Feel Good Again. I told them that while Dr. Dyer had given me an endorsement for an earlier book, I had no idea whether or not he would consider doing so again. I told them, however, that I would try. As is often the case in the publishing world, I sent out my request, but did not hear back. After some time had gone by, I came to the conclusion that Dr. Dyer was either too busy or unwilling to write an endorsement. I honored this decision and let the publisher know that we wouldn't be able to use his name to promote the book. I considered the case closed. About six months later, however, I received a copy of the foreign edition and to my surprise, right on the cover was the old endorsement for the earlier book from Dr. Dyer! Despite my specific instructions to the contrary, the foreign publisher had used his earlier quote and transferred it to the new book. I was extremely upset, and worried about the implications as well as the possible consequences. I called my literary agent, who immediately contacted the publisher and demanded that the books be taken off the shelves. In the meantime, I decided to write Dr. Dyer an apology, explaining the situation and all that was being done to rectify the problem. After a few weeks of wondering about what his response might be, I received a letter in the mail that said the following: "Richard. There are two rules for living in harmony. #1) Don't sweat the small stuff and #2) It's all small stuff. Let the quote stand. Love, Wayne." That was it! No lectures, no threats. No hard feelings...

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